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Tuesday, April 1, 2014

The Late Late Show: 1 April 2014


Today's recap has your 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed (Or Your Bandwidth Back) "No Complaining About Recent Series Finales of Popular Long-Running Sitcoms" pledge of reporting excellence.

Well, if you've checked your calendar, then you surely know what today is. And chances are you've already seen the promos CBS has been running for about a week now. Not to belabor the point unnecessarily, but suffice to say that today... is not gonna be your typical day in the Bob Barker Studio by any stretch of the imagination.

But hey, don't just take my word for it... let's have a little look-see, shall we?

Episode #
6682K
Airdate
1 April 2014
RTV
4 February 2014
First Four
John, Nicole, Jared, Jessica
Lineup
L-R
Models
Um... yes?
Note
"Check Your Calendar" Spectacular

If by some strange chance you didn't know by now, then it probably sounded like George had contracted some serious laryngitis during the intro. But, no, your ears do not deceive you -- those are indeed the dulcet tones of the one and only Shadoe Stevens calling down our Rowbirds today, he whose résumé includes such distinguished entries as American Top 40, '80s and '90s Hollywood Squares, and currently a little something called The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson.

And hey, speaking of the Scottish devil, there he is right now coming through Door #2. Yep, it's a classic April Fool's Switcheroo, as Price and Late Late Show have a little talent-exchange cast going today. While Craig Ferguson entertains the Peanut Gallery, Drew Carey & Co. will similarly be taking over the post-Letterman spot later tonight over most of these CBS stations.

Now, I will be the first to admit, I do not watch The Late Late Show. I think the most of it I've ever seen has been a few scattered bits and fragments of an opening monologue. Therefore, I am not in any position to talk about whatever running gags from Craig's day(?) job might come over to Studio 33. Take the handoff, for instance; instead of Rachel or someone, Craig receives his mic from a couple of dudes in the classic "two-man horse" costume, retreiving it from a bag around its neck (with the $ logo, natch). If that calls back to anything from late-night, I couldn't tell you. In any event... Right, so that's how it's gonna be, then. Strap yourselves in, folks, it's gonna be one of those episodes.

Hopefully in a good way.

On another note... Good Lord, did Shadoe age or what? I know it's been about a quarter-century since his run on the panel of the Davidson Squares -- and believe me, coming to that realization probably depresses me even more than it does you -- but he seriously looks about 110 years old right now. I don't know if it's the lighting in the studio or the fact it's just a reminder of how much older I'm starting to get. The good news, though: The pipes are still golden!

1. Pair of Android mens' watches (JE)
John
Nicole
Jared
Jessica
315
700
400
701



$1200

Here's a tip for ya, Craig: You can read the price tag better if it's actually facing you. ;^)

In order to keep the streak alive, they have to give Craig Money Game to start this show off; ever since 1994, that's been the first (aired) Pricing Game of every rookie host, from Doug Davidson to Drew Carey to even Gwendolyn during last year's April Fool's special.

No such luck this time, however, as Craig leads Jessica to Door #2 for Do the Math:
  1. Golden West Billiards pool table w/accessories (Horse Dudes)
  2. LG 68" LED HDTV w/Drew in Craig's house (Geoff Peterson the Skeleton)
...Okay, nobody's getting a guest-modeling credit for today's show. I'm sorry, but I gotta draw the line somewhere. I'm drawing it at the two-man horse costume and an animatronic puppet.
Forget math for a moment, let's do the logic:

Given: The cash bonus is $1,895.
Given: Pool tables almost always end in -95.
Given: That TV is the LG-po brand around here.
Ergo: Jessica needs to subtract.

Which she does...
Don't you just love logic? ^^;

Well, I see I'm right on par for my usual time with these episodes -- it's taken me 45 minutes to get to just this point!

Incidentally, because I know people are gonna ask -- Craig is doing okay as host, but Shadoe is killing it behind the mic.

2. What would a horse be without an Apple iPad Air (128GB) w/smart cover
John
Nicole
Jared
Sandra
850
851
599
800



$838

Lucky $even, with Geoff "driving" out the car like he did on Halloween:
2014 Mazda2 Sport (1.5L, 4AT)

1
$7

6
1
6
EXACTA!
$7
5
1
6
3
-$2
$5
6
1
6
3
5
-$1
$4
5
1
6
3
5
5
EXACTA!
$4 WIN!

I was fearing the worst when she called 5 for that -- you know how this show loves its 1s and 9s for the last digit lately. Instead we get the best Lucky $even result in ages, with burger money to spare!

3. Danby beverage center as described by the bag o' bones himself
(Craig: "You know, I have to say, these girls get thinner and thinner all the time...")
John
Nicole
Jared
Paola
710
800
1100
1000


$1530


Hi-Lo:
Trip to Las Vegas, NV (4n, Red Rock Casino, Resort, & Spa, 1 VIP bowling game, tour of Red Rock Canyon; $21,637)

...wait, what?! A four-night Vegas stay worth MORE THAN A CAR!? That is crazy, horse! Well, welcome to April the First, that's all I can say... anything's possible.

  • Snack Factory pretzel crisps
  • Smucker's hot fudge topping
  • Allegra allergy relief tablets (15)
  • Hungry Jack Diner Style hashbrowns
  • Libman Freedom multi-surface cleaner
  • Aspercreme pain relieving creme

As you might expect, two of 'em are dead-level obvious they belong on the Hi row. The question, as always, is what the third one should be. I'm tempted to go with the cleaner, personally... but let's see.

Hi
Allergy relief
Pain reliever
Cleaner

$13.99
$5.49
$5.99

Hi

Pain reliever


$5.49

Chips
Topping
Hashbrowns
Lo
$3.99
$3.69
$1.49
WIN!

It was the chips that gave me the most pause, since that's a gourmet brand and those can often be deceptively expensive -- perfect opportunity for a trap. But not this time, and Jared gets that über-trip!

...Great, I just jinxed it probably. I said the P-word.

(CC1: FarmRich)
Showcase Showdown #1, with Geoff standing by the scoreboard for whatever reason...
Jessica
45
95
1.40

$7,790
Sandra
95
.95
Jared
15
75
.90

$23,167

Craig: "[Sandra's] so happy about winning, she's not creeped out [by Geoff]!"

4. Napoleon outdoor fire pit (I hope that costume's not flammable)
John
Nicole
Mark
Paola
1101
1301
799
1300
$1299


OUCH!

When John hits the stage, he does a Hulk Hogan-style T-shirt rip to reveal a second one underneath!

Freeze Frame:
Cal Spas Escape Select hot tub (not a giant water trough -- and I hope animatronic skeletons are waterproof)


74
99

43
$7499
28
17
WIN, brother!
86

50
31


Not bad! There were three very likely possibilities on the board; besides this, the other candidates I was looking at were $9,928 and my personal pick, $8,631.

Y'know, I don't wanna say anything... but the combination of skeletons, Scotsmen, Shadoe, and day players in horse suits does seem to be a winning one today. If we can keep this up...

But, again, I don't want to say anything. Streaks like this are so fragile, after all. Let's just carry on...
5. Set of 4 Cuisinart coffee appliances w/reptile mug like Craig's
Tara
Nicole
Mark
Paola
650
500
1000
651



$892

More or Less, with that bonehead Geoff doing the describing:
  1. Selection of Makita power tools
  2. Trip to Palm Springs, CA (limo, 6n, Riviera Palm Springs, 1 dinner, round of golf)
  3. Frigidaire Affinity washer & dryer
  4. And no horsing around, it's a 2014 Toyota Tacoma 4×2 regular cab (2.7L, 4AT, sliding rear window)

See, this is why I didn't want to say anything. This game doesn't have a stellar track record. (At least it's not Gas Money or Stack the Deck...)

Tools
Palm Springs
Washer & dryer
$2000
LESS
$2500
MORE
$2600
LESS
LESS
WIN
MORE
WIN
LESS
WIN
$1500
$2975
$2198

Hey, those went easy! But now it comes down to that ever-popular coin flip for the big one...

Truck
$20,500
LESS
LESS
WIN!!!
$19,775

She wins everything, except the skeleton and the horse!

Five for five, including both car games... dare we hope?

With all this winning going on, pity poor Nicole who hasn't been able to partake of any of it. It's a long lonely charter flight to Leftover Island in her future, unless her luck changes rather quickly.

6. Pair of DXG Iron X waterproof camcorders w/wrist remotes from out of the Shadoe-s
Tara
Nicole
Mark
Laura
750
400
699
695

$500



Nicole escapes banishment -- but we have a bigger fish to fry right now, so let's get serious. We all know what's at stake in this playing of Squeeze Play besides the prize. Which is, just for the record:
Sea-Doo personal watercraft w/trailer (skeleton not included)

0

0
9

0
0
9
0
7
5
1
8
4
0

Naturally, it's a random-number prize that could realistically be any of the three options ($7,514, $7,184, or $7,584). This is a straight-up 1:3 game of chance as far as I'm concerned...

0
9
0
9
Remove the 5
0
9
0
9
$
7
1
8
4
0

This is it. If that Sea-Doo is $7,184, we've got our second perfect show this season (after going almost four full years without a single bona fide perfecto that didn't have to be fudged).

On April Fool's Day of all things, with a cast switcheroo in full force.














































Wouldn't that be just typical? When Drew's away, the games will play...































































...let's see if we played well...























































...as Craig hits that oh-so-important button...























































...to reveal...























































...we have a...























































0
9
0
9

0
9
0
9
$
7
1
8
4
$
7
5
8
4
EPIC LETDOWN

...thud.

So close... ah well. Five-for-six with a Lucky $even and More or Less win ain't bad, right?

(Closed captions for the epidermially-impaired: Drugstore candy / CTT)
Showcase Showdown #2

Nicole
95
.95
WIN
John
60
90
1.50

$8,798
Paola
65
50
1.15

$27,340


Showcases: Sandra top winner, Nicole runner-up.

1. All About Our Skeletal Friend, Geoff
  • Apparently, according to Craig, he's a real clothes horse...
    • Jimmy Choo shoes & clutch
    • "Nothin' creepy about that," insists Craig...
  • ...and despite his unfortunate build, fancies himself a real slab of beefcake...
    • Multistation home gym of unknown lineage
  • ...but while he may be an emerging fashion icon with the strength of a 2-month-old, but since they don't issue licenses to robotic skeletons, he can't drive this...
    • 2014 Scion xD (2.4L, 4AT, but the horse can drive!?)
Sandra bids $26,300.
(My bid: $25,635)

2. And Now It's Time for Geoff to Return the "Favor" and Tell Us A Little Bit More About Our Substitute Teacher
  • Despite living in the US since 1994, he still can't "speak American"...
    • Acer 23" all-in-one computer (2MP webcam, 8GB RAM, 1TB HD, Epson AIO, Level 1 language software)
  • ...and while Craig may be a pilot (like another famous former Price host was), Geoff wouldn't be caught dead in a plane with him, so he's arranged for a real pilot to fly you to your next destination...
    • Trip to Maui, HI (6n, Outrigger Napili Shores)
      • 2hr sunset cruise
  • ...and we've scrounged up a semi-embarrassing photo of Craig as a drummer during the 1980s, which is of course terrible... but this ain't!
    • 2014 Toyota Yaris LE (1.5L, 4AT, carpeted mats, cargo mat, LoJack+, and carrot sticks and sugar cubes for all)
Nicole bids $25,000.
(My bid: $23,116)


Moment of Truth
1. Nicole
Hawaii/Car
2. Sandra
Car
Bid
$25,000
$26,300
ARP
$26,727
$25,899
Result
$1,727
$401

Nicole wins!
$27,227
$17,196
My result
$3,611
$264

And that wraps up an outstanding day in terms of prizes won!

Yes, Craig does the spay-and-neuter signoff...

LEADER BOARD: Episode #6682K
Paola

$27,340
Nicole

$27,227
Jared

$23,167
Sandra
$17,196
John

$8,798
Jessica

$7,790
Offered
$145,004
Won
$111,518
Pct.
76.91%
Bonus
Avg.
$18,586
Median
$20,182


You just don't see Leader Boards like that anymore... and that's no joke!

Uh-oh... some ominous verbiage in the end credits, but it doesn't appear as though it's gonna change anything. To wit:

"A discrepancy was discovered with a Showcase item at the conclusion of the program. The outcome was not affected."

So relax, folks, nobody was ruled ineligible or anything like that. Unless and until I hear otherwise, the numbers I have here will stand.

Everything's back to normal tomorrow, including (hopefully!) my schedule... see you then!

3 comments:

  1. My mom got me into the Late Late Show (via Letterman), and all this time I never knew that was Shadoe himself as the announcer there.
    All in all, I'd say this was one of TPiR's better April Fool episodes. The antics of Craig, Geoff, and Secretariat (the horse) transfered quite well here. Before all the promotions, I was expecting the cast to switch up with the gang from Let's Make a Deal, but this worked just fine.
    P.S., The TPiR cast took over the Late Late show the night before.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Y' know, a TPIR/LMAD switcheroo wouldn't be a half-bad idea for next year.

      Delete
    2. It's something I've been waiting for them to do ever since they brought Deal out of mothballs. Still, I suppose they have to keep something in reserve for when a planned stunt falls through for whatever reason.

      Delete